I found this, and I felt it was worth sharing. Apparently, there are lots of people with pain…
“I know how this works….you think you are better than others, and so you allow them to fall to your superiority.
It’s a stupid game I’ve played for most of my life–the trying to make every group happy in hopes I would fit with one of them. It just never works. It didn’t work when I was a kid, and it doesn’t work now. It’s just become more painful as I’ve gotten older. You really suck, and you know who you are. It’s so easy to put people off. They don’t fit, so don’t include them. I’ve included everyone for fear of offending anyone. You are not so brave. You exclude anyone who isn’t quite like you. The hurt is beyond what you will ever feel. You are so protected. You are better than I am. You are more normal. You #$*ing suck, and part of me can’t wait for you to feel my pain. But I sit here and behave nicely. That’s what nice people do. They suck it up and move on.
I don’t know who will read this, but I bet that whoever reads my words has felt these feelings of betrayal and loss. Obviously, the ones of whom I speak won’t read it. They are busy with the perfection of their lives, or with belittling my life, and wouldn’t have time to read what someone else is feeling. Get over it, you say. Move on.”
I’m so sorry for your pain. I have had it, too. Good days and bad days….Some days are just like that. It’s so much easier to keep our pain to ourselves, but sometimes, it is worth sharing with others. Somehow, I think others might have felt her pain, too.
I am Susan…amazed by grace